R and I celebrated 10 years of marriage last month, and a lot of friends ask how we met. I want to share that with you all, along with some thoughts on love and marriage.
We met in 2011, on a social media site that I'm pretty sure no longer exists. I messaged him first, with a very creative and original "Hi". That's all I think of to say at 17, with hardly any basis of what I should say to boys. I was homeschooled and very socially awkward, probably more than most girls my age back then. Especially now. I don't think teenagers in 2023 even go through an awkward stage. How lucky for them. Anyway, he responded and told me I was pretty and the conversation went from there. We stayed up late chatting, before we called it quits and went to bed. The next day, I had another message from him and, as they say, the rest is history.
He lived two hours away from OKC, in a small town. We agreed to meet in person around a week after talking online. We met at a mall, where we watched a movie and hung out. He had the audacity to kiss me on our first date, and until a few years ago, he had no idea that was my first kiss ever. We spent almost every other weekend together after that, until he moved to OKC around a year later for a job, a few months before we got married.
Our wedding was...not what I expected. It was very stressful, and while I did not regret marrying R, I did regret not eloping. It would've been way less work...and way cheaper. It didn't matter too much to me, because I was so excited to be married and start our life together. Marriage was also not what I expected. Learning to share space and live with someone else was more difficult than I anticipated, but overall we got along very well and learned each other's moods and routines quickly.
We were married a little over a year before I was pregnant with Z, and having a baby turned our world upside down again, but in the best way possible. Four years later, we welcomed B, after buying a house three years prior. We've had a lot of fun over the past 12 years, and more than a few ups and downs. But, speaking for myself, I love him more every day, and I didn't think that would be possible after we fell in love 12 years ago.
Marriage is far from easy. It's a choice we make every day, but being married to my best friend makes it worth it. He's taught me so much about unconditional love and grace, and I know without a doubt, God picked him just for me. I'm looking forward to the next 10, 20, 30 years and beyond, and I know it will get better and better as we grow together. There's something special about getting married young and being able to "grow up" together. We've made so many mistakes, but we made them together and I wouldn't want to make terrible (and great) choices with anyone else.
R, I love you and I'm proud of the life we've built together. Thank you for loving me the way you do.
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We've survived 25 years with the basic precept that each of us cares more about the other's happiness than we do our own. Life is full of ups and downs, but doing it together makes everything possible. :-)